Tuesday, December 06, 2005

Narnia: The Lion, The Car, and The Turkey

Well, I'm going to finish the fourth book in the The Chronicles of Narnia series tonight. That lion is a pretty cool kat. I keep waiting for him to eat the kids, but he hasn't yet.

Today, during a conversation concerning the upcoming Narnia film (Dec. 9th), a very pretty woman asked me equally very nonchalantly what "old C.S. Lewis was doing these days?" ...I'm pretty sure I'll keep my relationship with her strictly somatic.

Another person that I conversed with this evening wanted nothing more in the world than to tell me all about muscle cars. The following is a section taken directly from the transcribed repartee:

Asian Car Guy: ...And the 05's were already extremely heavy at 3,400 lbs!

Me: That's crazy, man.

Asian Car Guy: But, come on! 3,800 lbs?! I mean, yeah, it has over 500 horsepower, but...

Me: Yeah, I know.

(Later)

A.C.G: ...I mean I'd put a fat block on there with a few bolt down mods...

Me: -That's crazy, man.

A.C.G: ...I mean if we're talkin' "I have a million dollars" here, I'd put mods on the chasis of course, but that's way expensive.

Me: Yeah, I know... That's crazy, man.

(Later)

A.C.G: ...I mean the Subaru (indecipherable) is an amazing model. Do you like the (indecipherable) or the Subaru (indecipherable) better?

Me: Oh, I-I don't know. That's a tough one, man. I mean... ... .. .

A.C.G: -Yeah, I know what you're saying, but I think I'd definitely go for the (indecipherable).

(Later)

Me: Man, you should try going to a Jay Leno taping and meet Jay and talk to him about cars. He's a car guy too, you know?

A.C.G: Yeah, that would be cool. Man, you know quite a bit about cars too. That's cool. Hey, could I get another shot of Absolut?

Then I wrapped the night up with this one guy that ALWAYS comes in and orders two Calistoga mineral waters and a turkey entree. I'm mean we're talking two or three times a week for months - two mineral waters, one turkey entree.
But TONIGHT he ordered, "Two Calistogas and..."
"-The turkey entree?"
"No, how 'bout something different."
"Wow, okay. Here's the menu."
(moments later)
"How about the half oven roasted chicken entree."
"Sure."
I felt shocked, confused, happy and hurt.
I just considered this guy to be terminal; a textbook tryptophan addict. And here he was all at once cured... Cold turkey.

Talk to you kids soon. Night.

3 comments:

Two Guns said...

Wonderful. Bravo. My favorite part is that I had to look up two of the words. Dude, I didn't realize you knew so much about cars.

On another note, is it cool if I give you a gift certificate to Big Dogs for Christmas?

Anonymous said...

Wonderful!!!!!!

But what do you think about this?
www.millioneuroblog.com

Do you remember when I said...

How about a mass gift certificate toward the entire outlet mall instead?